You Don’t Need a Good Enough Reason

Prioritizing Yourself Without Guilt

Have you ever noticed how easy it is to spend your time, energy or money on something that needs to be done?

The car needs tires.

The house needs a repair.

Someone in the family needs help.

Work needs your attention.

You may not particularly like any of it, but you don't spend much time questioning whether you should do it.

It needs to be done.

End of discussion.

But what happens when the reason is simply:

I want to.

Now the discussion begins.

Can I afford it?

Is this really the right time?

Should I be spending the money on something else?

What about everything I need to get done?

Maybe I should wait.

And my personal favorite:

I haven't earned it yet.

Apparently, wanting something for ourselves requires supporting documentation.

Wanting It Is a Reason

I'm not suggesting that wanting something means you should automatically do it.

We have responsibilities. We have commitments. We have budgets. Our choices affect other people. There are times when not now is the right answer.

That's where consideration comes in.

You consider the impact. You consider your responsibilities. You consider what matters most. You consider the realities of your life.

And you consider what you want.

That's the part we can be quick to leave out.

Wanting something isn't selfish simply because you're the one who benefits from it.

When you've considered the whole picture, including yourself in the decision isn't selfish.

It's making a thoughtful choice.

The problem comes when everyone and everything else gets consideration and what you want is automatically treated as less important.

You don't need to make what you want the only consideration.

You do need to make it one of them.

Stop Waiting… Stop Defaulting You to the Bottom of the Priority List

After the project is finished.

After things settle down.

After you've taken care of everyone else.

After you've been productive enough.

After you've earned it.

We can come up with a lot of reasons to wait.

And sometimes waiting makes sense.

But when waiting becomes your default, so does putting yourself at the bottom of the priority list.

There is always another responsibility.

Always something useful you could be doing.

Always someone or something that could make a legitimate claim on your time, energy or money.

So if everything else has to be handled before you make room for what matters to you, where does that leave you?

At the bottom.

Again.

This isn't about putting yourself at the top of the list every time.

It's about recognizing that you belong on the priority list in the first place.

Because I'll get to it later has a way of becoming next week, next month, next year—or I never did.

Put Yourself in the Decision

Maybe you want to visit the friend you haven't seen in years.

Take the trip.

Sign up for the class.

Spend an afternoon doing absolutely nothing productive.

Go to the concert.

Sit outside with a book in the middle of the day.

None of those things requires you to abandon your responsibilities.

They require you to include yourself when you're deciding what matters.

That's different.

You don't need to choose yourself instead of everyone and everything else.

You do need to stop automatically choosing everyone and everything else instead of yourself.

So the next time you hear yourself building a case for something you want, pay attention.

Think practically. Consider what matters. Make a thoughtful choice.

But don't leave yourself out of the equation.

Sometimes:

I want to.

Really is a good enough reason.